The Four Shades of Introversion: Understanding Our Inner Worlds
Introduction
Oh, you know I couldn’t wait for this one!
I want to start by clearing up a common misconception: introversion is not the same as anxiety, shyness, or social awkwardness. I get why you would think that, it’s what society has always said about introverts, and as one myself, even I had these misunderstandings. But, introversion is diverse, more grey than black and white.
That’s why I want to discuss the four distinct shades of introversion. I hope you allow yourself to explore what you currently identify with, if you may be a blend of them, and consider if you’re 2% extroverted like yours truly.
Yeah, I know. I’m surprised too.
The Thinking Introvert
Thinking introverts are introspective and thoughtful. We spend a lot of time in our own heads, mulling over ideas and reflecting on their experiences. This kind of deep thinking is crucial for our personal growth and healing.
Basically, we’re the people you couldn’t say “it is not that deep” to because it probably is.
The Social Introvert
Contrary to popular belief, there is such a thing as social introverts and we do enjoy socializing! We just prefer smaller, more intimate gatherings over large crowds. For us, big parties and concerts can be draining and we don’t always know ahead of time when our social battery will run out.
We’re much more likely to spend time with a few friends or loved ones, which can be incredibly fulfilling and energizing. Again, we’re not anti-social. We simply value quality over quantity in our interactions.
The Anxious Introvert
Anxious introverts are likely why everyone thinks introverts are shy but it’s not their fault. I’ve been there!
Anxious introverts often feel nervous in social situations, particularly large or unfamiliar ones. This anxiety can stem from self-consciousness or fear of making mistakes and that constant worry about saying the wrong thing can make socializing challenging.
Have you ever had a flashback of that embarrassing thing you said or did years ago?
Anxious introverts are haunted by these things all the time and without warning so they feel safer not saying or doing much of anything. It’s exhausting!
The Reserved Introvert
Reserved introverts are the quiet type. We enjoy solitude and may only need to be social occasionally. My mom is a reserved introvert and so is my brother. Of course, they’re likely a blend like I am too!
We all find comfort in our own company and are content with our thoughts and hobbies. Books, solo activities, and quietly existing surrounded by our people with the occasional commentary are some of the things we enjoy.
Debunking Myths About Introversion
As I mentioned before, people misunderstand what it means to be an introvert. Here are a few myths I'd like to dispel:
Introversion Equals Shyness: Not all introverts are shy. Shyness is an emotion that usually relates to fear of social judgment while introversion is about how you recharge. Both can be a personality trait, but they are not the same thing.
Introverts are Anti-Social: Again, introverts can be social butterflies! We may even be labeled a “people-person” if we’re also a thought leader, generally friendly, or a content creator. We just prefer meaningful interactions over small talk. Like, if I could teleport anytime someone tries to force me to make small talk, I would.
Introverts are Pushovers: Stop assuming that because introverts are quiet and usually don’t speak unless we have something to say, we are easy to manipulate. Try Jesus first, not me. - We can be very firm about our boundaries and values. When you test that, you’re essentially giving us a pass to go ahead and have a good time, alone.
What My Blend of Introversion Looks Like
I took a quiz similar to this one and my results came out as thinking and social introversion with a touch of reserved and that 2% extroversion. Shoutout to growing up with a big extended family cause that 2% extroversion helps keep me going every time it’s a family affair.
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned that I love planning small gatherings at home or short vacations with people I love. I’ve even found ways to manage my energy so I can enjoy social events without feeling drained. I know, it’s amazing!
While I’m so happy I discovered my shades of introversion as an adult, I was definitely an anxious introvert growing up and quite shy. I still didn’t talk unless I had something to say, which hasn’t changed much, but I’ll never forget a high school incident that happened one morning.
I was sitting with a few classmates and friends, and someone I thought was friendly enough asked me why I was so quiet. There was a hint of anger and frustration in her voice which surprised me.
Why was she uncomfortable with my silence?
She hadn’t asked me a question directly and I had no input on anything else people were talking about.
Yup, I’m still baffled by the whole experience to this day. It is what it is.
Conclusion
Introverts recharge by spending time alone and we come with a variety of blended personalities, all worthy of getting to know. Whether it’s reading, playing video games, watching movies, or just relaxing, solitude helps us regain our energy much like being around people helps extroverts thrive.
Understanding the different shades we come in helps us appreciate the unique ways introverts navigate the world and as a thinking, social, reserved, slightly extroverted introvert, I love that!
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